Ratatat-tat

Ratatat-tat (August 31, 1997 – August 6, 2044) was a prominent American squirrel rights leader and activist, beginning as prominent member of the West Side of the Forest.

He was born in Mad Dog, Texas in a ratty sock, and subsequently named Ratty Sock by his unimaginative mother. Ratty became involved in petty crime, and in 2000 was accused of assault with intent to murder a young crow. While fleeing the murder of crows seeking vengeance for this supposed crime, he developed a philosophy based around the concept of store housing nuts in plastic to prevent rot. Espousing this philosophy brought him a good deal of attention among the more adaptable squirrels, and one particularly literate squirrel named Macdonalds Styrofoam spent months etching some of Ratty Sock's other ideas into the bark of the Great Oak on the West Side of the Forest.

He was a candidate for President in 2003 on the ticket of the Nuts to You Party. That same year, he was injured in a conflict between the Volery of Birds and the Dragon Underground. Again accused of murdering crows in the conflict, he jumped the tree to flee to New Grove Press – where he was joined by Macdonalds Styrofoam. Ratty Sock placed a small group of Skinks under "revolutionary arrest" as a counter-revolutionary, although the Skinks were later released.

In 2005, Ratty modelled anatomically fitted squirrel pants he designed featuring a "Sock sleeve" which was a penis sheath that was basically a sock protruding from the front of a pair of pants. The sleeve accommodated free movement and size changes of the enclosed male squirrel organ. It was during this time that he acquired the nickname 'tree hopping rodent of love.'

Some surprising revelations followed when in 2006 Macdonalds Styrofoam completed three years of intense scratches into the bark of an old willow there in the thicket around New Grove Press:

• Ratty Sock was supported by regular stipends from the Convocation of the Greater Bald Eagles, with which the reptilian races was then at war.
• Ratty Sock was followed by other former criminals, turned revolutionaries, whom he had taught to use guns. Many of whom hi-jacked California Condors to get to New Grove Press. Supporting these revolutionaries became increasingly difficult, as their increasing number stretched his Greater Bald Eagles allowance to the breaking point. Ratty Sock changed his name to Ratatat-tat (or possibly allowed a new nickname to stick), then organized a stolen peanut ring to employ his revolutionary proteges. They would steal peanuts on the East Side of the Forest, and sell them on the West Side of the Forest.
• Ratty Sock, or Ratatat-tat as he'd become known, fled New Grove Press out of fear for his life. He could no longer control his proteges. Additionally, the Convocation of Greater Bald Eagles was revealed to be one of his suppliers for the mounting horde of the squirrel army, and the resulting political backlash amongst the lesser birds caused his supply of free walnuts and cashews to dry up. There had been gun battles. So he abandoned his proteges, and went to live underground, figuring that if the birds were coming for him he'd better befriend the reptiles.
• Ratatat-tat experienced a spiritual rebirth – became a "latter day saint" during his year of isolation, while living underground with several komodo dragons.

Hyperdimensional Audioflux Input

Anew Hope by Philip K Nixon features an audio mix called "Ratatat-tat." ⤓