You use your eyepatch for its comedy effect

You call yourself "Eyepatch". You have a series of lame ass jokes about wearing one. The audience fucking hates you. Someone has a telescoping blow gun. He shoots a poisoned dart into your other eye. You are blinded never to see again. You almost die from the toxins of the poison. You are left weak and sightless in a cold world that does not care.

  1. live off of monthly government checks
  2. rig yourself with explosives for a suicide joke-bombing on stage
  3. You next set of jokes is about being totally blind as a result of sucking at comedy
  4. You get a job writing skits for semi famous Mollkin cable TV personality Mollky Tomass