You shake your head calmly. "But Martha," you say, "there are no rats in my yard."
"Well you attractin' rats to MY yard, then!" she spits back.
"Are there rats in your yard, Martha?" you ask.
She looks offended and insulted. "Of course not!" she proclaims.
Hmmm. "Well," you say calmly, "maybe the thing to do is to put out some traps in your yard so if any rats do come, they get caught?"
Apparently this was the wrong suggestion. Her eyes bug out and an involuntary shudder runs up and down her left side. She storms back into her house, slurring her words and spitting.