2012-01-29 - Meth Lab Burns down

Noted town bigot, Augustus Breen.

A trailer methamphetamine laboratory reportedly exploded on the outskirts of Simpso in the early evening on Sunday. According to the Sheriff's Department, three bodies were recovered from the site of the blast, all unknown Sasquatchi who, according to neighbor Augustus Breen, apparently worked the laboratory.

When asked for futher comment, Neighbor Augustus Breen had this to say: "Stinky furriners, we knew they were up to no good. I say, about time, and good riddance!"