This is so messed up, even by your standards, but you've always wanted to fight a baby, ever since you read a report about the Golden Sumo Babies of Samoa. It is your dream to fight one of these amazing toddlers, and, even if it costs you everything, you're going to go for it!
Unfortunately for you, the try-outs are harder than you could have conceived, and these kid contenders are tougher than you ever imagined was possible. You're both terrified and inspired by the thought of how awesome at fighting the chosen kids must be.
Your first match, you step into the ring with one really ornery baby, and he stomps, posing and giggling. You go nuts, throwing your all into this fight, a rage of crazy punches flying, only to get your stupid ass slapped to the ground. You try to get in close with a little more finesse, aiming for a quick jab for the knock-out, but this kid just absorbs it like he's made of jelly! A few more slaps, and you are so humiliated and angry that you get ready to really smash this kid. Howling curses, you charge! Big mistake!
The last thing you see is a tiny, flabby fist coming at you...