23 Days in the life of Motley Howe

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Day 1:Dream journal

Dream journal entry: 1-13-94:Flood season I walk through ankle deep water, through a strange woods. The trees have arms and legs, I can't believe its rained so much, so fast. The rain starts up again, me and Melissa run into my trailer, but its not mine "Sorry,wrong trailer",I say. Mel's crying. I talk to the lady in this trailer. She and Melissa go to the couch. My gun is stashed behind her trailer, I'm laying belly down on the floor,I notice some H. P. Lovecraft books.

Motley Howell,stumbles into consciousness his dream journal in the bed beside him, he reads the earlier morning's entry. After breakfast, and a shower, he goes to visit Aubrey, that vary special, sensual, floppy boneless funky girl. They sat and talked,legs rubbing together under the table.

Aubrey, "I've left,Kevin!I told him about the 3 times I've seen you lately.His was real pissed! he he he he".

Motley is pacing around, the air feeling hot and dead in his trailer, he was packing to go to Colorado, but he didn't really wanna go. He had misplaced his mindgoggles for his mind-man unit. He checked under his chest of drawers He can since a pulsing threatening evil presence there. The chest of drawers had mutated, the legs like stilts, enough room for him to put his head and upper torso into. He scanned around under there, but he could only see pitch blackness. He felt around with his hands, blindly groping he could feel a crackleing dark energy, making his hairs stand on end. His heart was bursting, pounding his chest,sweat oozed from his body, reflecting black. He relaxed, leavieing his hands under the chest of drawers. The energy faded to a low throb of ominousness. He slept a bit then, recharging energy.

That night after a long walk in the country, he went to bed, visions of Aubrey in his head, her long sparkleing hair her overall rubbery body, that could bend in amazeing ways! Her sunlight bright smile that would dazzle him into sexual delerium. Also,he thought about Genseng, Aubrey's favorite herb, she ate it all her life, now her bones are bendable, and she heals cuts in 20 minutes or less, he thought about, the recent UFO hysteria ,and he thought about what it would be like to sleep for 40 hours,through the use of a rare south american tuber beetle extract.Then it was sleep time for Motley.

He had his first dream 4 minutes after falling asleep. He was walking down a stairway, stumbles,tham begins falling fast down. He wakes up with a gasp,heart racing, he lays back down, closing his eyes again"!,I'm dreaming,2 I'm dreaming 3,I'm dreaming",he thinks as he drifts off again....

Day 2,Cusp

Dream Journal entry; 9-14-94, Road trip I get in my car with Dovi. she's drunk and vary friendly. As I drive down maple I notice a red Target tub full of boxes of books-now Brian gives me a stack of paintings I did. He found them at Lovecraft park,they were hanging from trees. Thats odd Motley thought,My painting just seem to disapear and pop up at the strangest places. I notice Aubrey going down west street, I yell at her but she doesn't hear,her face seems so dreamy, peacefull.

Motley howe wakes up with a empty since of yearning, he rises naked, penis bobs like long semi-flacid jello, with each step, a single tear drops shining from the tip.

Tea, more Tea. This is my day off. he boils several gallons of chamomile tea and bathes in it. Feeling groovy, the dream tension fades away, along with the remnents of the dream mood hangover. outside his window a jimson plant with one single huge white flower reaching for the Moon. He liked to talk to the flower, when the moon was full. But he always had the creepy sensation that inside the erect flower there lurked a hideous ugly semi-transparent spider thing. The sight of it would make most vomit. He had to put his ear right up to the plant to hear it talk, the insides of the flower tickleing his hair.

He thought about masterbating, but he did'nt know himself well enough. Whats to do, nothing today, nothing. He decided to go back to sleep. attempting to have a lucid dream.

Melissa and a girl loaned me a porn video. As we watch it they rubs they're baree toes against mine. The Nova-dreamer cue goes off, I see two huge red blinking lights,I realize I'm dreaming.

Sceneshift: We are on a flat featureless red land. I pull out two big joints. We smoke them and walk on, we end up at twin bridges. We have brushes, we paint the bridge. I strip to my underwear. We take turns kissing each other. He wakes up again and gets out of bed, to get his dream journal, this time his penis is hugely erect, well,semi-hugely erect. Does it look better hard or flacid? Survey says......

Day 3:Impending binge

Dream journal entry;9-15-94, Hostile crowd. I have to Piss. I walk around the pond, and pee on a pair sunglasses on the ground. There is ice and snow on the ground. Lots of people about, they scream and jump at me brandishing golf clubs. I run to my trailer through theY're cars. Inside trailer I search for a safe place to hide, I wander through endless rooms,they never stop.I go for a piss, bullets rip through the window.

Motley wales up in a comatose state, he had cooked up a bag late that night, falling into a deep slumber an hour and a half later. His eyes a bright blood red, they open veins. He stumbled outside. The bright sun was a light storm in his head. He went back inside and chewed mindlessly. How he wished for a idea for a painting, or something. That dream must have been from an experiance he had last week. Driving bv a golf course,a couple of G Q guys threw golf balls at his car, one dented the back fender. If he had his gun right then,he would have popped a couple of rounds at them, they would have ran away screaming for help! But no, he just drove on curseing, as the other plastic golf people patted the ball throwers on the back. This is not the fisrt time Motley had been met with open hostiility lately. Two weeks ago he had been walking on the road after dark. A small brown pick up swerved aroumd a corner and nearly ran him over, the 3 dudes inside laughing and slapping hands. They drove on a hlaf mile and came back, Motley was well off the road by now, watching them concealed in the trees... When he walked around with friends, they would tell him of the hatefull, sometimes murderous looks so many others would give him. Motley rarly noticed though. Sometimes on the road man would give him a hatefull sneer. Today was drift away day. Cloud rideing awhile away day. He did what he loved most, slept. He smoked a couple of bong hits, just enough to provide vived colorfull visions when he lay down with his eyes closed. He sees with his inner eye,rolling hills a poppys cats among the plants, He sees Barbara Bush in studded neck coller, sneering holding a thick crude club. The stars in the sky are star shaped, along with dice flaming as meteors coming down. He sees Ron Hill crowned with ivey. Women fan him and feed him grapes in a tropical paradise. Now he sleeps, but he cannnot remember this dream that he has. Me and Eric go for a walk after dark in Witchita. We are looking for a pizzaplace, but get lost in a endless area under constuction. We see a school I open the windows and door,we go in. Wandering through endless rooms, we find a table,of cassettes.We stuff our pockets with tapes of bands we like. Cops rush in pulling out rifles, we scatter. I end up in the auto-shop of Target, a girl meets me at the door. There are dice of mine that someone has left out, scattered on the floor. My boss comes in, and hands us dream masks. I hear a coyete howling somewhere in the auto shop.

Day 4:As it was

Dream journal entry;9-16-94, Lucid couch I buy a pop at a quick trip when I pull out my change I pull out the brain tape that was in my pocket to. Some friends who work at brush appear around me. A concerned citizen driving outside has seen my brain tape he lurshes the car off the road, and gets out heading for me, cussing me out for useing mind changing tapes. My friends pelt him with rocks. Scene shift: I'm at home sleeping on the cot.The nova-dreamer cue goes off, I become lucid. A cute cashier lifts her shirt up showing her belly. I stay lucid for a long time, watching her perfect naval. She lifts her shirt higher, she has no bra,her perfect breasts jiggle. She gets on the couch with me. "I'm dreaming" I say to her, getting out a joint..

Wow! what a wonderfull dream, laced with sex and pot. He took 3 bong hits and coughed his way into breakfast. Off to work he went the radio played souless corpoate rock, he swtiched to iazz. While driving he could of swore he saw a strange thing. A long spinning black and white object in the air. Like a bunch of ovals connected, white on one side black on the other. It looked kinda like a kite or something, but no one was around to fly it. It flitted away into the night and he soon forget it all together. He worked 6 hours and drove home. later he visited with Aubrey, he sat beside each other on her couch. legs lightly touching He wished he a sculpter and could make, objects wilth the exact texture of her flesh. He would feel them and rub himself all the time,Whatever. Later that night he was talking to some friends over a massive amount of weed. Dovi was there. She hugged Motley and they talked about odd times. Whatever..... Head spinning he settled himslef to sleep after being up 24 hours. His eyes stung, his head spun. Hypnogogoc visons packed his head. So empty, no fixed goals, no belief. Nothing to believe n'nothing to grasp, but smoke like bubbles of truth that pop with a mocking whisper. No one to believe in, no such love but skin a on skin and even souls are wearing thin. Void Oblivion, no fixed goals,thin tired souls. Been carrying the weight too long everything we know is wrong. How deep and delerious and dismal. Oh how these wierd moods hit me like a backwards acid trip. Motley shifts in his web of thick high thought. What is freedom? Whatever.

Day 7: Lost weekend

Dream Journal entrys: ?-94(Lost in the white noise) I'm in grade school, the kids my former grade school classmates, they are tiny, grade school children,I'm adult size. "Get him!"yelling they charge me. "Fuck you", I scream as I sink my fist into a 4th grader. He hurls backwards,vomiting blood.The others stop and look at me silently - accusingly.

Indeed,what is sleep? Motly thinks to himself as he rises, fully clothed from 6 hours of sleep. Six hours! thats a record! Three days lost!!! I remember strange partys, new girls smiles and rubbin as smokey laughter rings hollowly in my ears, he felt like saying. All the world is on fire brother, Inside his head thoughts swirled and glistened:

Sad fever world. Hot fire disire. On with the t v. A extened bit about the revelation, all the bad people will be horribly destroyed. People like me you fucking fungus! motly adds.AS the world goes down whimpering you Christians can sit back and ignore the suffering because those are bad people and Jesus will come and take you away before it happens to you. So shut up and obey orders,cuffew starts a 10:00.The signs the signs,the end of the world,well maybe,but it not like you insects see* -i t. The preadher says Aids is the plague that comes to de^roy,hesavers the word destroy.The giant hole in the ozon'e will scorch the sinners, that is good he says it's fun,you know watching,because heavon and hell are so close together that those in heavon watch those in hell suffer,enlovina thier pain.Even gutted family members on the other side will give you a thrill and giggle.ah waht a wonderfull fucking reward.

But wait my friends, there are other gods,yes and they have infiltrated. The Easter Bunny.The God of fertility, mad freak with red eyes and raging erection. He is in some ways like pan, vary sexual and breeding wherever he goes, and like pan he has his wild, bizzare side.

Satan I mean santa clauss,the god of greed and need,of plain With his imps, I mean elfs, for he casts sugar plum visions in the sleepind minds of most children. Some dark children however, see him for what he is, and compeat to be the first to to do a sex magic entrail bath. The cults of the two major religions wage war with each other, who are there good quys and/bad guys here? No clear motavations, everything is a mystery.

Sometimes when I'm out walking I see the eggs, half buried,I never touch them. sometimes I arrange rocks around them in a circle. I want to sleep, you know, flash of a party sometime, somewhere everyone there was wounded threading water, scar eyes register group pain', Inner peace,whats that? thats the stuper of exhaustion or of drugs,cut out that consicousness "Yes doctor! cut it right out, no more conscousness whatever". Come outta thais sick bitter dream, Motley . He gets up again without having really slept, just kinda implodded you know.

day 8:no dreams recalled

Motley did what, he did most,it's fun you know,watching. Visions of Aubrey in his head. Motley Howe stumbles into concousness, ending up in the autoshop of Target. smokey laughter rings hollowly. Everything we know is wrong and stuffed with muffins,it gives you a thri11 and a giggle. He hurls backwards and twitches through eyes of wine. Does my penis look better hard, or flacid? What a wonderfull dream. candles float about, but wait my friends: The girls, crusted with frost, rub thier big toes agains't him, the rain starts again. He goes for a walk after dark,out of a dream within a dream, anger billows, he searches for a safe place to hide. Dream soft unbilical angels are bad peaple, Motely shifts inhis web. His thick stoned thought is of Aubrey's over all rubery body. Six hours of sleep will scortch the siners. He plays a brain tape and falls into a sick bitter dream, like a backwards acid trip. low throb of ominousness, Motely laying belly down on the floor. everything is a mystery. "I'm dreaming " , he says to Aubrey."a wonderfull fucking reward". Sensual floppy boneless special funky girl,all the world is on fire!

She meets him at the door, yellow fever spinning raging erection, he is eating special mid-sexual cakes. Motley rubs himsself all the time. This is the new meat season. "Carcosa will vanish",he says drawing up a chamomile bath. Hot fire desire, they are so close together, her perfect breasts jiggleing. Smiles and rubbings they have not slept Now they roll left handed cigerettes.Thick high thought scar yes register group pain, soaking in narrow notion.

Odd times whatever, Motley had been met with open hostility. Getting out a ioint smoke like bubbles of truth, dreaming of imaginary theorys. What is sleep? I'11 vomit oceans of wierd moods. Women fan and feed him grapes,indeed what is sleep? Dream soft Mr. Howe coughs his way into breakfast. On break, he walks through ankle deep water to a cute cashier, they rub legs together under the table.

Motley thinks on the plummet now Aubreys bones are bendable. She gets on the couch-the stars in the sky are star shaped, my sensual floppy mid-boneless special girl! "Bemoan the mildew,I go for a piss" he says in morning emotion. Viberation heart beat he did a consume a large Amount a weeds, eyes still water.

Delerious and dismall gutted family members, no such love. The recent UFO hysteria mentions the Illuminati. what is freedom?Motely closes his eys again smoking a joint, he goes through the looking glass.W alking down a stairway he smokes two bong hits.Theyre wierd moods, Someone hands them dream masks, dream moisture falls thick stoned thought, dripping from the near dream. What ever-some where warm is here now. Tension fades away,brain search emtyness, that swirls and glistens. Vision of Aubrey in his head, now he sleeps,h as sick bitter dream. Hit me,he took 3 bong hits. His gun is well stashed, this is the new meat season, through the streets of Corcosa. Enjoying the pain he would now like to sleep 40 hours, dream mosture fall .Vomiting blood shut up and obay orders,......Rolling hills of poppys. there is nothing to grasp ,the world goes down whimpering.... Motley rarely noticed special sexual cakes .Through endless rooms her sunlight bright smiles afrozen stobelight

Day 9: Generation x speaks?

Dream Journal entry:9-20-94: I'm alone in the trailer,I see a dark shape looming in the bedroom, quickly I jump out the window onto the street outside. I walk away quickly and meet a lady out there target practicing. "Its too dangerous here she says.

Excerts from Motley's journal of his most intimate thoughts: Should a man be jealous of a tree on animal farm? What the fuck?,cut up a love letter, glimpse the truth. Aubrey rested comradely arms on my shoulders,causing the hairs there to erect.Knee deep grasses swirled and glistened in the jungle when the moon was full, barren of human life.Fundamentalists up to my ears, I shift in my web. Aubrey,wild, yet so very fragile,can summon the dead, silently,accusingly. Within was only silent darkness,an unknown animal cried out,offered me an ancient,wrinkled grin.

Motely went to lunch with Aubrey, this is their conversation as noted by an undercover snythetic cop,molded into an catsup bottle.

Aubrey grabed Motley's arm and said "Experiance pleasure and pain!".

"Does it look better hard?", Motley asked, chewing on a french fry. Remember that bACKWARDS ACID TRIP?, when you stepped down outta bed, while I beat my arms across my body?".

"If you get a new girlfriend I'll vomit oceans of dickless wonders". Aubrey gave him a hot look he could feel in his pinial gland. With a generous helping of lust, he tentaively brushed Aub's waist with his hand. Aub has blue roses tattooed on her knees. "Why are you so into drugs?", she asks. Motley was loseing it, wanting to fuck her brains out.

Motley thinks we were stripping ours clothes off once, in the vale of dreams, an ominous mist rolled. "We are so close together in this sad fever world, take me to meet the tree". says Motiey!!!

"obsession was flanking me", Aubrey states with a shy agressive smile. Motley pissed all over himself, representing free choice.

"I would love you too". Mot said, looking up from his bacon and eggs and breaking the silence.

"I can turn your jism to light, throw the switch.somewhere warm is here now". the light in her eyes like blue oblivion,no fixed goals. Her jutting breasts felt a thrill of strange awareness. She took up her top hat and gloves.

"This is the meated season, the Elder Gods remember the ways of my testicles,check please!"

Day ll:Did gyre and gimble in the wabe

Dream journal entry:9-22-94:Location past a line of trees accross the street from my trailer.Here guys are playing guitar, me and Melissa are sleeping We wake and smile estaticly at each other, she lifts her shirt up showing her belly,lifts it up,she wears no bra.Bugs chase us. I grab some bug poison,"Fuck you assholes",! yell.The bugs shase us.We end up on an empty lot with cats all about.

Motly called Aubrey one morning, zinging on herbal flip flops. She answers with silky scratchy morning voice.

• "I was an Illumanati puppet",Motley states.
• "Drink me, thrust it inside", Aubrey offered,they shook hands, time and space had melted in thier desire and they where there together in a restruant named Chapel Perilous. She dipped a naked shrimp hatless on a viberating bed, she bolted and ran.

Unable to control himself any longer, dream soft Motley smiled and let go of her arm, "Bad love beats none,I'm translating the NECROMONICON".

• "This is my first tea high", Aub said as she fingered her new ear ring. He made passionate love to her again.
• "Run into my arms". Motley rarly noticed she can turn into a wolf when the wolfbane blooms. His huge eyes observed her, the heat making her perspire "We shall bring forth glorious choldren",he said. He produced a book from his briefcase,"I've got a copy of THE BOOK OF SACRED MAGIC OF JEREMY PERKS,he said,cock half hard.

• Aub handed the phone to Motley,"Its H P Lovecraft".
• "Share our meal", Motley offers. "She loved me",Mot closed his eyes again,the dream still shuddered.
• LOVECRAFT--"Rich orgasm, get the vaseline and rub the endless loop.
• MOTELY-----"To be me in a blaze of light", shes my

goddess of secrets".

• LOVECRAFT---"Indeed then, what is sleep?"

MOTELY------"Cut up a love letter,nothing else to do in kansas". LOVECRAFT----"The door opened,the mask of Cthulhu,the walking dead". MOTELY-------"I fell in the shower,completely naked dream flesh".

Was it a dream? We remember back a bit, whenever whatever. Among rolling hills of poppys. Motely held a pipe, Dovi held funky sexual cakes. Nor was they to touch themselves, among the candles,they sort of tease eachother. "what is freedom?Meet me tonight at the mistatonic libary",Aubrey commands,pouting her sexy lips,sweetly.

Day 13: We don"t exist

Dream journal entry:9-24-94:At a outside religous rally. A blond is being sermoned by naked men.I go back to the trailer for awhile,then go back to the main group of people. I'm calling everyone long distance.I see Christina,she looks vary pretty.I fondle a couple of the ladies breasts. Kansas is a strange neighborhood I think... Motley wakes up a sweating nudey. Everything seems to be on a loop,playing the same things over again,he thought.He had chamomile pancakes for breakfast,dad called,said you are scum. Motley has a bit a marijuanna! He smokes and closes his eyes, trying to escape the pain of being Motely. .................Mock turtle soup will harm your creative mind, Motely's dream body hurls backwards.

Motley's dream body hurls backwards.

• "Love is 23 skidoo,Mot says crumpling the note and tossing it in the trash. "I had nothing to eat but Mock turtle soup".
• Dovi was stoned too,"why do I drink?" She hugged Motely on the highest tree, the Illuminati surfaced nest in the garden of delights.

• I hope you'll wake up
• The drug-dream very nice genitals

Motely is considering suicide, aversion, distrust, and fear. Sexual tension,two big jooints overgrown with vines. Vack should be sent the fellow sigh. The cheeks of my ass reflected sunlight, being in love means total surrender. Pelt Vack with rocks so violently. My cock pulsed in a hashish dream. Cut up a love letter in the cornfelds around the city. Motely is always high, be warned. Keep "I'm under surveillance, they are just wearing a long flannal shirt. You want to fuck while i was jerking off. Stark naked, plenty of fun beneath his stained little doll. Motley began to moan as Aubrey brought on evil dreams. Dovi's obsessed with smoking opium and hashish. Dovi lay on her stomich, what is freedom? Provoking the anger of the flowing yellow mask. Motely was angry-and the autmm moon is bright. He woke up briefly, to the sound of thunder and pelting rain. It's fun you know, watching the white smoke. Aud says"! apologize for hitting you during sex on acid". His awful dreams needs more and more of the drugs.Aubrey walking with a blanket,her tight fears would fade. Motely nods and smiles at her small breasts.

"What a tongue fuck,like a trip to Yoggoth and beyond". Motely found marijuana at twin bridges. He is the 23rd savior sitting up in bed, hugging her kness. Dovi wanted so bad to feel the time clock.

• Tension fades away feeling plessure everywhere in my body
• Love is funky sexual cakes
• Ron Hill sighted at the streets of Carcosa

Soma floats in the darkness electricity in the air, stripped down to her panties. Vack dying for the love of the Easter Bunny, Dreaming found it in the bedroom naked dream besides Vack. Night of September 23,there was a huge white flower on the bedrroom wall. At the Easter Bunny's mad tea party, the sound of muffled sobbing continued. Jacking off, full of misery Mot put a finger to his ears.

Fuck you sad fever world

Day 14: Meated season

Dream journal entry: 9-25-94:I'm in the receiving oil diaper area, Aubrey gives me a strange beer. It makes me angry that Ray has gone insane and has a gun. I beat him violently, the pagens are stealing things.

Motely wakes up from this dream while driving to work, he almost hit a stop sign. He shakes his head to help clear his thoughts. My mind:erogenous zone. He swung his car violently into the Miskatonic university libary, cutting off Aubrey's retreat. A long dead world, a mad tea party.

• Motley---"Beware the jabberwock".
• Aubrey---"Funky sexual cakes through the liquid gulfs of infinity".
• MOTELY---"Unearthly cosmic beauty having tea".
• AUBREY---"What is freedom?

The Easter Bunny believes that the Illuminati will pounch you in the nose".

• MOTELY---"Addicted to a drug out of a dream within a dream".
• Aubrey---"A morbid blasphemy,do it now love,I would love

you to". Smiles and rubbins,they are so close together. Struggle and pain,Aubrey loved it.

Grunge girls lack of clothes on Deadfolk's day. Motely shifts in posefull abandonment eating opium. He finds two true faces of Ron Hill half buried in his back yard. One is made of fear the other of control. He hurled his knife into a stack of his paintings.

He got out a tarot deck and asked the special secret question:He drew The knight of lovemaking on the floor ejaculating. The reading, Cup full of water, fuck atomic secrets back and forth peddling your purple ass. I dream now staring at the card. It's Deadfolks day, the houses decked out with bell and lights, mot falls dizzy. At twin bridges he smiles at her sexually. Its immoral to fuck me in the watermelon patch. Aubrey eyed the young men she was afraid. They will go to Arkham unself conscious of their nakedness on august 23. Dream flesh Aubrey, sad fever world, claims to have visited Irem. Yes with the mask of night read the NECROMONICON on that bitter holiday.

As they talked, Motely was hooked he could wrie poetry and he wanted to hang up the phone. Aubrey began chanting again "Aaauuuurragh!Aaauuuurragh!". On that mine on Yugguth Aub wanted to obsess over Mottles.

Rigid shaft! Mottles was frolicking in the woods, And the mome raths outgrabe.Reading THE GREENVILLE DREAM MANUUALS they are learning to fly. The curse of Yig, the moon hid behind a cloud with glinting eyes. Motely's tattoo was a masonic Jabberwock. He stood in a dream room silent, naked with wicked toys. He had just walked through 34 rooms each unlit and filled with odditys. All dream houses have endless rooms,each is a dimension onto itself. He is lying naked with tantalizing thoughts and passionate delight. Her breasts are the garden of delights. Genital sockets ending in a grin. The drug-dream human divine dinner in the looking glass house. Lips against his ear as he opens his drug case, suddently he wakes up and goes to the kitchen to grasp a cup of herbal tea, warm his hands and head step outside. Theres Aubrey with chilled wine and cigerette, hugs him. At twin bridges, gentle twilight fingers pre-fuck her.

attraction and passion. leaves me feeling very inadequate

rickus grinned fiendishly forwards. He was vampid and stragulious in his own distiny. But fuck that and all and all. He Easter Bunny crosses the mid sexual cusps of crotch wasps. His is the lush grassy paradice always wet with warm dew. He is pan,he is sex. He takes me underground to the halls of Easterns.

Slip away,zombie death. Black darkness the eye of the undermind has finally blinked, milions die! Halls of vomit rides molten thoughts of brainpuke. Rats feast on a sick burning world. Random objects smoke in fields.What else?

U.N. officials bombing iraq, but Iraq was given the power to sting like a scorpion. Last month the drug-dream satisfied her breasts and abdomen. Rickus,author of the classic Ligntning and thunder issued from weapons and long-range missile denyied that he refused to destroy all his chemical biological weapons of mass destruction. The search for the elusive dark times is coming. The una-bomber must save the world. His explosives devices are clues to the man's motivation. The Unabomber threatens use of biological veapons. The Unabomber is blamed for a drug task force getting shot to death.The bomber's latest letters on sexual occultism. Missiles were flown by rebel Unabomber's drug cartel. Drug money laundering,crazy demand for cocaine and nuclear weapons.The Iraqi cocaine caused the deaths of 3 and the injury of 23.

A creative sensuous man won 23 million in the lottery. Mad Carcosa leaves me feeling very threatened. Do I satisfy my wife as well as rebel serbs? It is so romantic to blow up the lake of Hali. Drive by shootings at the bridges of Lost Carcosa. Rictus cautioned that drugs arrests won't end. Die thou unsung, Prince charming.

War with warplanes is unhealthy for all concerned. Black helicopters are so beautiful.Overpowered by the shock, deputy arrested in killings. Were really hell-bent racked with quilt over putrid love in a four-day affair. Confess to your spouse that there's nothing out there.

Romantic relationships are lurking masked in the city of Hastur.

Day 15:its colder now

Dream journal entry:9-26-94. Clouds of smoke rise in horizon I leave the trailer naked to check it out. Cops are killing people. I have my cordless phone, page my boss. Lots of cute girls about,gasping and dry heaving...

Its colder today,thinks Motely. Cold like the chill the cold sad fever world deal. The american nightmare so heavy on Aubrey's shoulders"Kiss my Pussy".

"I love your groin,fingers and palms", said Mottles. Lusty behavior made his legs feel rubbery. Theres tuberbeetle eggs in a pool of water, he sees while walking. "The goddess of Illumination stares hard at a cigerette". Mot rolled over into sleep grasping fan and wearing the white rabbit's gloves. Motely sees the street signs all are yellow signs, and the building are unearthly. He knows this is carcosa,he is dreaming. "What is feedom?',he asked no one but the echoing alleys and hissing wind.

"Eruption of sexual pleasure, oral intercourse", a distant bleating voice answered back.The sun ray s fell on the Illuminati as they arrived and lit up a joint. Screaming with rage and sexual desire his rage was unbouded, Twins in heat, beware the Jabberwock's dream flesh.

"I am sorry", he tells the Illuminated ones, his crotch burns as he fills a pipe. He is doing all those freaky sex acts in ChawVille, where the great pale poppies bloom. "Was that a dream?" Mottled did not really care, he got up took another piss and went back to bed with a throbbing headache. Aubrey sitting on the sand near the mad Hatter, a quiet kiss. Eating chocolate He felt her breasts and trembled raging erection by the turn turn tree but Aubre had turned sulky.

Mot walks among the stars with a warm blanket Pure at heart he felt safe in this drug dream. Go fuck with mad animal panic eating a certain alkaloid herb. The NECROMONICON Watched him in the mirror, the phone line went dead. I love her sexual drugs of orgasm, in the form of mid-sexual cakes, that sucks, Aub had no friends just guys who wanted to stick it in. Now Mot sleeps weeping madly. In bed he did tantric sex yoga with the looking glass. We will live in the looking glass on August 23. He walks barefoot with silverware and a broomstick."Always carry weapons because I love You. Mot the cinder biter, bites a mushroom bit,with a bulge in his jeans. Go to Easter island, the Illuminati love you. His blond hair and blue eyes smiled at her. Eat apple-opium laced with mid-sexual hash. Virus b-23, a love spell of some kind. He drank liquid mushrooms and fell asleep again."Your hurting me,wheres my gun?"

The paranoid kitten loves you Love..romance... you love me get me my gun Perfumed shooting stars at Innsmouth Kadath in the cold waste makes me paranoid, I find dice Post card town wierded out in a sick and frightening way. Calm saior finger across his lops opened the bag Ohhhh ahhhh pleasure so fantastic sex in lucked dreams.

Fondle in euphoria pop with a mocking. Jesus will come and see a strange thing, the meated season. Motlely went to visit Aubrey,Impending binge, looking for a vein Life in orgasm by useing brain changing tapes. Strange partys ,new girls, soft cusps of crotch wasps.: "You fucking fungus", she lifts her shirt to show her belly . Suffering hell of morning emotion. mv sexual jiggleing funky speicial bonelss girl. The stupor of exhaustion , whatever. she lifts her shirt up higher, sad fever world pelts him with rocks.

Sleeping on the cot - there is nothing to believe in, I want to sleep. Aubrey has no bra on. we can now tell. Triangle was then added, with soul moisture . After a shower and breakfast ,Motely thought about masterbating. "Pre-fuck me, Easter bunny:. No such love , so empty no fixed goals, he has finally gone mad. His cock stiffens all the world is on fire, through eyes of wine. pinned to friends she hugs Motely,the mad freak. Watching her perfect naval, he settled himself to sleep. His head spun laced with sex and pot, he knows no rest. Dovi was there on a Backwards acid trip.

what is sleep?, all is lie a lie .. .Yelling they charge Motely, he fights the Illumanati . silence , accusations , no clear motivations. He hears a coyete howling, in a mood hangover .Hole. in the ozone? whatever whatever whatever

He thought that some where warm Jesus would come and women would feed him grapes and fan him. Closeing his eyes on the streets of Corcosa , impending visit to Aubrey. They roll joint. He smokes a couple of eyes of wine, now she rub he smiles and rubs knows no rest No fissed goals what is sleep? She gets on the couch and hands us dream masks My boneless tremblinq funky girl, with no fixed goals, so empty inside. a girl meets me at tho door with a frozen strobelight. nothing to believe in' everything is a mystery but wait my friends when are pinned to friends, she lifts her shirt even higher still, tension -Fades away. it's fun you know, watching. does it look better hard or flacid?

These wired moods his head spun yellow fever spinning thick stoned thought.Soul moisture Soar eyes mid-sexual cakes through the looking glass morning emotion he took 23- bong hits whatever

Day 16: Happy Puss

Dream Journal entry: 9-27-94: I live in Duane's trailer, cats are all about. I go to get me a sandwich, a girl there likes me, she smiles and talks. We are in folding chairs, we smoke alot of dope.

Get up late, slept all day, still wearing the dream mask and drinking hot chocolate. Mott says"God is dumb". "'I'll play in the gardens of lucid dreams".,he insists. Dream Audbrey stands before him in R E M."Kiss my pussy make me love you",she says with her sexy scratchy voice. Illuminated by dream manuals they are doing all those freaky sex acts. It's bedtime,Motely will show you sex magic. After sex arms and legs in intersteller space. His dream body plays love is a mystical experience. Mourning doves calling, "What the fuck,have oral intercourse". Mottle lit a joint,rain fell on our 23rd savior. Beware the jabberwock's slobbering extasy,warm blue spurts.meditation distorts the time clock/Free is suppressed and burbled as it came! Motely set off in pursuit of luminous sex magic. Caressing in dream state is more pleasent he held her arms. They had been smoking some more on the shore of the lake Hali. They kept their secret maps of the cities on Yuggoth. His throbbing lovestick a frozen strobe light, silver light,calm savior. Lust mad and pure at heart ,he burst into tears.

The Easter bunny was grasping at straws, marijuana, funky sexual cakes, toast, eggs(sunny side up),and LSD, what the fuck? Under the moon with totally strange hookah, he buys a bag of marijuana. His clock is considering suicide. A wonderful dream hashish. The band Akuzma is upon the hearth in the ashes, reeling in confusion. Shooting starts are spurts of seman, freednow from their descent down to hades. The dark side of Motely's character once went naked, beware the jabberwock. She loves me, the 23rd saviour, can turn a wolf. The revelation of saint Daune Glaze sends me realing. Mot will suck love what a fucked up world, cut up a love letter. He saw beautiful very smart genital sockets.

• "Hail Eris",she smiled.
• "More light!",life in orgasm muffled sobs continued. Mottles stops gasping, kissing her neck.
• "You lied", he says. Looking glass house alongside the road , across the street from the graveyard. Love my cock, she loves me. Throbbing lovestick, human devine dinner, Funky sexual cakes.

Day 19: Partial copy

Parts of the trailer above him bust into sawdust and metal shrapnal, he is lying wounded pumping the trigger but there are no more bullets. The agents run up two him and kick him into a coma. The unconscious body is taken into a truck and rushed away as they search his trailer for brain machines and tapes. These devices are out lawed now along with vitamin cigerettes porn tapes, herbs,and being care free. Whatever

Day 20:What ever

The truck does not make it far, it is stopped by aliens who want to use all on board for some surgery experiments. He is made to forget it of course or he would go insaner. That brings us to....

Day 21:Weird vending machine

Strange no dreams last night, thinks Motly, who also finds it odd he woke up fully clothed in the middle of a field. The mutilated cattle about him also seems a bit odd.The weirdest thing of all is that he woke up fully clothed. Anyway he walked awhile down the dirt road untill he came to a dismall small town called Fnordstock. He sees a old battered vending machine and approches it fishing money from his pockets.The items in the machine startle him:

• 1:Rusty fishooks,some with worm bits on them.
• 2:Rocks,unwashed
• 3:A tiny doll like face, looks like carved by native americans.
• 4:Ginseng caplets.
• 5:maps of corcosa,you can get there by taking a wrong turn anywhere, the hard part is finding your way out.
• 6:yellow dice,two per bubble.
• 7:amber frogs,and jade bears.
• 8:petrified cotten candy.
• 9:a green pulsing fungus ,in crackedplastic bubbles.
• 10:The "Mystery bubble",it was jet black,so you could

not tell whats inside.

Motely puts in a quarter and hits a button at random,coming up with the mystery bubble. He carefully opens it and out comes a tiny kitten trinket and the chinease fortune cookie messege:In a mountain caves the easter bunny gave a great cry of rage. He folded the messeage carefully and put it into his pocket. He walked down the creaky, nowhere highway. EVery mile there was a scarecrow being cruisified. He found a yellow blanket along the road and he picked it up. He walked with it until he got tired then he slept in a ditch taking this must be the season of the witch.

Day 21:sadness grasps my left ventricle

Mott has no more dream journal, the feds took it away, it's illegal to record your dreams, and a felony to have lucid dreams, also missing is his books on meditation,and dice.

When napping behind the trailer with his cat he dreams That he is walking through ankle deep water at a garage sale, theres a swarm of junebugs, one of them flys up his ear. Swimming in the flood water are hundreds of long grey half snake half insect things, with dozens of barbed spikes and pinchers on hundreds of legs. Long ash colored mandibles with a one foot span.

He walks through fields and side-roads, coming on the area where a magic bridge is.He don'tknow just how to find it from here,but he chooses a road and goes.This road takes him to a overgrown sidepath that seems interesting.lt is about the size now of a walking path,trees hangs over it,from one a venus of willendorf hangs.On ward he sees a rotting wooded wall on either side of the road,here he meets a dwarf. He is a black man who walks on stumpy arms andlegs.MOt got down on his hands and knees to hang with him .Alone comes 4 men in middle ages period clothing.He remembers now that he knows them from way back wherever.Its good to see odd friends again.

• Make chew friends
• But keep the odd
• One's to saliva
• And the other is god

Day 22: Mindless other gods lined with erectile hairs

• Open eyes moon rise..here we sit in circle all thats round is holy...now we talk..to try to get *it....the
• new aoen

• Mottles (to all in company,except powdersnort Me fibrehumidian)

"Expierance the heightsof pleasure with sex and dope".

• Bandit the cat "Did you enjoy your stroll?"
• Soma "Those executions the queen had ordered where met a chorus of whistles"
• Motttttt "Among rolling hills lush with poppys,she stepped down form her bed".

Zipper the wandershark"Lucid dreams will sort of tease you".

• Dovi( as she hits the joint)"ON animal farm, when the moon was full I played violin hiding behind a telephone pole".
• All in unison"2 legs bad 4 legs good".
• The easter bunny (shimmering in horny/holy light) "The imortal gods use biological weapons. Oral dream intercourse in passionate delight".

Motlee "Keep those in the looking glass house under surveillance they have been illuminated by Virus b-23".

• Bandit the cat "All hail discordia".
• Mottless "Does it look better hard or flacid?"
• Dovi(as she shoots up mushroom extract) "Indeed what is sleep?".
• The easter bunny"! have the spoken word NECROMICON on 23 audio brain tapes,listen to them,you need to be saved.

Day 23 :Day 23

MMMOttt dreams he is rubbing against a brown haired girl. We are seated in desks at school, ours are side bv side .We decide to quit school and walk to twin bridges. We walk to the other side of the bridge there is some fuck there insulting and threatening me. I warn her he is probaly dangerous. I grab him by the chin and pummel the back of his neck as I pin his head to his chest.

Mottles's dream machine had melted into his head, anytime he fingered the spot between his eyes there were two red flashesssss. He used them to dissemate police cars and free the world, not really.

The aleins landed and said they were here to make us into meat,and brain soup. But we fought them off with wet towells. The new world order rusted in its own puss and vomit and cracked up into drift wood. Global warming saved us from an early ice age and the rain forest grew back overnight, bringing a rain of magic mushrooms all over the world.The f d a disbanded and everyone got healthy. Back and to the left.

• whatever nevermind

The Easter Bunny is numb now packed with cotten sleep and naked warm girls against him. Motles wanders the world naked save for his yellow blanket, women feed him pussy wherever he goes. The 23rd savior flames with eternal life in the Hardon of Eden. Fondle Aubrey, pleasure receptors forever!!! Aubrey has such a pretty belly button, he likes to watch it for several minutes before going to bed. Day 23 is happy and everything turns out fine. Everybody fucked and partied and talked, and all that sorta dribble for a thousand years! then Corcosa disapears and everyone starts getting paranoid.

Afterword

I'll babble more later where books are pillows. I'm outside smoking a joint with'a blinding flash I'm going to new Jersey under the blanket.I open the gunand walkaway quickly. Where did that blond go? Bobbling on a cane. No trembling back now while running through a feild At the house in Maize I trip and fall women in varyous states of nudity go on as I dress the car lurches off the road on the way to chapil perilous what a curious way to die early morning chill on the road to the slaughterhouse.

• completely naked I become a white buffalo I find some indian artifacts.
• I find toys and other objects half buried I find a bag pocket it.
• Cat that is sleeping looks very dangerous I hear him,he looks at me funny.
• Climbing through clouds of smoke rise a big mood hangover two red lights follow me.
• A few books touch them chewing on cinders I keep tapping.
• Rubbing her pussy it's almost knee-deep shadow the dog follows me through a huge ice storm.
• The cute girl and I are going to make love . I'm naked clothes spread about.
• I talk to a lady and fall onto the lawn

oneself crusified in the chamber foam on a beach of skin,I'm drenched

• I kiss her on the bare feet

giant turtle frog watches the local news I walk through ankle deep water with a big joint steamy cunt killed the cat.

• He has gone insane he has a gun he laughs and sqeels off God said "Find buried, dice in your underwear"
• Hypnosis-pocus sexual occultism.