Infictive - User contributions [en]

MediaWiki:Citizen.css

2026-07-04T05:13:29Z

Gwodder: DEAD AIR v0.1α: stencil nav icons + red CTA

/* ================================================================
DEAD AIR — Great Alarm theme v0.1α (on Citizen)
Manila broadcast card · ink · signal red · stencil caps
================================================================ */

/* ---- Day: the broadcast card ---- */
:root {
--color-surface-0: #e9e2cf;
--color-surface-1: #e1d9c2;
--color-surface-1--hover: #e6dfca;
--color-surface-1--active: #dbd2b8;
--color-surface-2: #d9d0b6;
--color-surface-2--hover: #ded6bf;
--color-surface-2--active: #d3c9ab;
--color-surface-3: #d1c7ab;
--color-surface-4: #c9bfa0;
--color-emphasized: #211f1a;
--color-base: #3d3a30;
--color-subtle: #6d675a;
--color-placeholder: #8a8371;
--color-disabled: #a29a85;
--color-progressive: #8a2a20;
--color-progressive--hover: #a03227;
--color-progressive--active: #6f221a;
--color-destructive: #c8352b;
--color-destructive--hover: #d94a3f;
--color-destructive--active: #a82c23;
--border-color-base: #c5bda6;
--border-color-subtle: #d4ccb5;
}

/* ---- Night: the after-midnight rebroadcast ---- */
html.skin-theme-clientpref-night {
--color-surface-0: #191713;
--color-surface-1: #201d18;
--color-surface-1--hover: #26221c;
--color-surface-1--active: #1b1814;
--color-surface-2: #27231c;
--color-surface-2--hover: #2d2820;
--color-surface-2--active: #211d17;
--color-surface-3: #2e2921;
--color-surface-4: #353026;
--color-emphasized: #ede6d3;
--color-base: #cfc7b2;
--color-subtle: #948c78;
--color-placeholder: #7a7263;
--color-disabled: #5f594c;
--color-progressive: #e06a55;
--color-progressive--hover: #ea7f6b;
--color-progressive--active: #c95a46;
--color-destructive: #e05545;
--color-destructive--hover: #ea6a5b;
--color-destructive--active: #c9463a;
--border-color-base: #3a352b;
--border-color-subtle: #2e2a22;
}

@media ( prefers-color-scheme: dark ) {
html.skin-theme-clientpref-os {
--color-surface-0: #191713;
--color-surface-1: #201d18;
--color-surface-1--hover: #26221c;
--color-surface-1--active: #1b1814;
--color-surface-2: #27231c;
--color-surface-2--hover: #2d2820;
--color-surface-2--active: #211d17;
--color-surface-3: #2e2921;
--color-surface-4: #353026;
--color-emphasized: #ede6d3;
--color-base: #cfc7b2;
--color-subtle: #948c78;
--color-placeholder: #7a7263;
--color-disabled: #5f594c;
--color-progressive: #e06a55;
--color-progressive--hover: #ea7f6b;
--color-progressive--active: #c95a46;
--color-destructive: #e05545;
--color-destructive--hover: #ea6a5b;
--color-destructive--active: #c9463a;
--border-color-base: #3a352b;
--border-color-subtle: #2e2a22;
}
}

/* ---- Broadcast-card typography ---- */
.mw-body h1.firstHeading {
text-transform: uppercase;
letter-spacing: 0.05em;
font-weight: 800;
border-bottom: 3px double var( --color-emphasized );
padding-bottom: 0.3em;
}

.mw-body h2 {
text-transform: uppercase;
letter-spacing: 0.03em;
}

.mw-body blockquote {
border-left: 4px solid var( --color-destructive );
font-style: italic;
color: var( --color-subtle );
}

/* mono service voice: categories, footer, taglines */
.catlinks,
.citizen-footer,
#siteSub {
font-family: Menlo, Consolas, "Liberation Mono", monospace;
letter-spacing: 0.04em;
}

.citizen-footer__desc,
.citizen-footer__tagline {
text-transform: uppercase;
letter-spacing: 0.09em;
font-size: 0.8em;
}

/* ---- Masthead: signal-red rule under the header ---- */
.citizen-header {
border-bottom: 3px solid var( --color-destructive );
}

/* ---- Nav drawer: mono stencil voice ---- */
.citizen-drawer__menu .mw-list-item a {
font-family: Menlo, Consolas, monospace;
letter-spacing: 0.06em;
text-transform: uppercase;
font-size: 0.85em;
}

/* ---- Stencil icons for the nav (mask = alpha of inline SVG) ---- */
.citizen-drawer__menu .mw-list-item a::before,
#p-navigation .mw-list-item a::before {
content: "";
display: inline-block;
width: 1.05em;
height: 1.05em;
margin-right: 0.6em;
vertical-align: -0.15em;
background-color: currentColor;
-webkit-mask: var( --da-icon ) center / contain no-repeat;
mask: var( --da-icon ) center / contain no-repeat;
}

/* home: alarm triangle with clapper dot */
#n-Main-Page a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Cpath d='M12 3 22 20 2 20 Z' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.4'/%3E%3Ccircle cx='12' cy='15' r='2' fill='black'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }
/* policy: clipboard rules */
#n-Policy a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Crect x='5' y='3' width='14' height='18' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.2'/%3E%3Cpath d='M8 8h8M8 12h8M8 16h5' stroke='black' stroke-width='2'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }
/* about: broadcast i */
#n-About a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Ccircle cx='12' cy='12' r='9.5' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.2'/%3E%3Ccircle cx='12' cy='8' r='1.6' fill='black'/%3E%3Cpath d='M12 11.5v6' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.4'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }
/* recent signals: seismograph pulse */
#n-Recent-Signals a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Cpath d='M2 13h4l3-8 4 15 3-10 2 3h4' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.2'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }
/* random door: a door, ajar */
#n-Random-Door a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Crect x='6' y='3' width='12' height='18' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.2'/%3E%3Ccircle cx='15' cy='12.5' r='1.5' fill='black'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }
/* adventure: compass rose */
#n-Adventure a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Ccircle cx='12' cy='12' r='9.5' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2'/%3E%3Cpath d='M12 4.5 14 12 12 19.5 10 12 Z' fill='black'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }
/* funding: collection coin */
#n-Funding a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Ccircle cx='12' cy='12' r='9.5' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.2'/%3E%3Cpath d='M12 6.5v11M9 9c0-1.2 1.3-2 3-2s3 .8 3 2-1.2 1.8-3 2-3 .9-3 2 1.3 2 3 2 3-.8 3-2' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='1.8'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }
/* request credentials: the key */
#n-Request-Narrator-Credentials a { --da-icon: url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' viewBox='0 0 24 24'%3E%3Ccircle cx='8' cy='12' r='4.5' fill='none' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.2'/%3E%3Cpath d='M12.5 12H21M18 12v3.5M15 12v2.5' stroke='black' stroke-width='2.2'/%3E%3C/svg%3E"); }

/* the one red item: the call to action */
#n-Request-Narrator-Credentials a,
#n-Request-Narrator-Credentials a::before {
color: var( --color-destructive );
background-color: var( --color-destructive );
}
#n-Request-Narrator-Credentials a {
background-color: transparent;
font-weight: 700;
}

MediaWiki:Citizen.css

2026-07-04T05:11:29Z

Gwodder: DEAD AIR theme v0.1α

Infictive:Funding

2026-07-04T05:10:02Z

Gwodder: Donation page placeholder for rebroadcast

= Keep the Alarm Ringing =

The Great Alarm archive runs on one small server and a stubborn refusal to let 46,000 pages die twice.

''Donation details coming soon. This page is being rewritten for the 2026 rebroadcast — the original Infictive funding page lives in the page history.''

MediaWiki:Citizen-footer-desc

2026-07-04T05:10:02Z

Gwodder: DEAD AIR footer

KEY23 1999–2007 → INFICTIVE 2007–2026 → GREAT ALARM 2026– · The archive that went to sleep and dreamed big.

MediaWiki:Citizen-footer-tagline

2026-07-04T05:10:02Z

Gwodder: DEAD AIR footer

EMERGENCY ARCHIVE SYSTEM · EST. 2007 · REBROADCAST 2026 · THIS IS NOT A TEST

MediaWiki:Sidebar

2026-07-04T05:10:01Z

Gwodder: DEAD AIR nav

Bowlbetterology/Gallery

2026-07-04T04:02:02Z

Gwodder: Replace FLV embed with MP4 transcode (2026 restoration)

''Members of the [[Bowlbetterology]] cult?''

== Arte ==
<gallery mode=packed>
Image:Bowlbetterart_1.jpg
Image:Bowlbetterart_2.jpg
Image:Bowlbetterart_4.png
Image:Bowlbetterart_3.png
</gallery>

== Populi ==
<gallery mode=packed>
Image:Bowlbetter_1.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_2.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_3.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_11.png
Image:Bowlbetter_13.png
Image:Bowlbetter_14.png
Image:Bowlbetter_4.png
Image:Bowlbetter_5.png
Image:Bowlbetter_6.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_7.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_10.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_9.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_8.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_12.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_15.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_16.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_17.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_18.jpg
Image:Bowlbetter_19.jpg
Image:Yellow_X.jpg
</gallery>

-----
[[File:Richie_Phantastica.mp4]]
-----

[[Category: Bowlbetterology]]

Tobacco Man

2026-07-04T04:02:02Z

Gwodder: Replace FLV embed with MP4 transcode (2026 restoration)

A true God.

<div style="margin: 2% auto; width: 320px; border: solid #4D3B17 10px;">[[File:Tobacco_Man.mp4|320px]]</div>

[[Category:Orbital Space City Ketheres and its Subdistricts]][[Category:The Scrapyards]]

Steven Seagal

2026-07-04T04:01:59Z

Gwodder: Replace FLV embed with MP4 transcode (2026 restoration)

[[Image:StevenSeagal.jpg|230px|right]]
'''Steven Seagal''' is an American action movie actor, producer, writer, director, martial artist, singer-songwriter, and Jefferson Parish Sheriff's deputy.

He is also the reincarnation of [[Chungdrag Dorje]]. True story.

<br style="clear: both;" />

== Video ==

<div style="margin: 2% auto; width: 400px; border: solid #5baf51 10px;">[[File:702.mp4|400px]]</div>

<div style="margin: 2% auto; width: 400px; border: solid #7551AF 10px;">[[File:897.mp4|400px]]</div>

[[Category: Steven Seagal]]

You remain still in the hay

2026-04-16T19:31:40Z

Gwodder: Created page with "Totally still. Eyes closed so that the hay does not blind you permanently. Breathing calmly through your nostrils you wait in the hay. Peaceful and content. The mayor will..."

Totally still. Eyes closed so that the hay does not blind you permanently. Breathing calmly through your nostrils you wait in the hay. Peaceful and content. The mayor will never look for you here. Never.

You start to get thirsty a few hours into your perfect stillness. You had better wait until you're really, really thirsty to go looking for water, though. Every time you step out of the safety of the hay, you are subject to identification and apprehension by the mayor or his many employees.

# [[You wait until you are almost dying of thirst to move]]
# [[You wait until you think it must be dark in the barn to emerge]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You burrow into a haystack

2026-04-16T19:29:06Z

Gwodder: Created page with "The mayor would never think to look for you in his barn, but if he did, he would never think to look for you in a haystack. He would look in the sheep pens, in the pig stys...."

The mayor would never think to look for you in his barn, but if he did, he would never think to look for you in a haystack. He would look in the sheep pens, in the pig stys. Not deep within a haystack. In the haystack you will be safe and anonymous. You will make a plan for water once you have secured yourself inside.

# [[You remain still in the hay]]
# [[You burrow deeper in the warm hay]]
# [[You do not like it in the hay at all]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You disguise yourself as a cow

2026-04-16T19:15:18Z

Gwodder:

You disguise yourself as a cow, using all the material available to you as a pig. Your disguise is terrible, and you do not look like a cow.

You really have no choice, you must become a cow deep within yourself.

# [[You become a cow deep within yourself]]
# [[You try but fail]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You disguise yourself as a cow

2026-04-16T19:14:38Z

Gwodder: Created page with "You really have no choice, you must become a cow deep within yourself. # You become a cow deep within yourself # You try but fail Category: Hyperwiki Adventure..."

You really have no choice, you must become a cow deep within yourself.

# [[You become a cow deep within yourself]]
# [[You try but fail]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You begin to envy the life of the cow

2026-04-16T19:13:59Z

Gwodder:

Just like everything else in life, being a pig is fun at first, but it gets old. The pigpen is cramped and the other pigs smell bad. The pig slop that the mayor feeds you honestly isn't even very good. You spend hours gazing across the barn, over at the cows. The proud, dry cows, with their heads held high. Their beautiful white and black spotted hides are truly striking against the hay and straw. It's not fair. Why do they get to be cows, and you have to be a pig?

# [[You disguise yourself as a cow]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You like your pig disguise and you decide to keep it on

2026-04-14T03:32:02Z

Gwodder:

You like this pig life. You don't want to go back to humanity. The mayor comes by again to visit his barn. He looks right at you for several seconds, then just smiles and moves on. Your disguise is perfect! You almost can't believe it.

You just stay in the pigsty. After a while you forget it's a disguise. You're just a pig now. When you finally let go of yourself, your nervous system relaxes completely. You release your pig shaped contortion. No longer do you thrust and twist your face into the parody of a snout. You stop kneeling around on all fours. You still roll in the slop and oink and squeal, but you're doing it like a man would instead of like a pig. The mayor comes by again and he seems even more pleased than before when he sees what you're doing.

# [[You fall in love with another pig and you have a little Sasquatch child.]]
# [[You never stopped to wonder why the mayor keeps so many pigs]]
# [[You begin to envy the life of the cow]]

[[Category:Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

Go down to the park

2026-03-14T05:36:36Z

Gwodder: Created page with "down in the park you see a man and a woman feeding squirrels together. the man gets down on one knee and says to the woman, i just realized i can't access a single memory of..."

down in the park you see a man and a woman feeding squirrels together. the man gets down on one knee and says to the woman, i just realized i can't access a single memory of ever being comforted by my mother. please marry me.

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: Another fine afterlife I got me into]]

Cops come to your house with an arrest warrant for the use of clip art

2026-02-22T06:09:36Z

Gwodder:

You put out a bunch of flyers and go home to wait for responses. Here you are minding your own business, playing the Secret of Mana and eating illegal meats, when suddenly the cops kick in the doors and windows. "CITIZEN. CLIP ART HAS BEEN ILLEGAL SINCE 1998. STAND DOWN IMMEDIATELY." comes a voice from a helicopter. You swallow the rest of the illegal meats without chewing, including the raw shit in the fridge. What a waste. You shove a lump of frozen illegal meat up your ass and smile as the police flood the room. "Oh my goodness what an unexpected but welcome surprise," you say, hands in the air, as calmly as possible. "Would any of you cops like some iced tea or other completely legal refreshment?"

# [[You make a break for it though]]
# [[You try to ride out this police raid]]
# [[You try to get access to your weapons cache]]
# [[You use the panic button to release robot hell]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]]

You click and click on the Dollar sign in the top right hand corner of the site.

2026-02-22T05:55:48Z

Gwodder:

You click and click on the dollar sign in the top right corner of the page, but it just takes you to the [[Infictive:About]] page. You are rebuffed by some kind of secret hand signal.

You click on the dollar sign again anyway. You wish this thing worked. How are you supposed to give Infictive any money?

You stop. You realize how stupid you're being. Obviously you have to click the button the right way. There's a code you have to know. You wish you'd realized this before you started clicking, because there's no way to start over. That's what makes the scheme so devilishly clever. You'll have to use a different computer and try again.

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?]]

You click and click on the Dollar sign in the top right hand corner of the site.

2026-02-22T05:55:22Z

Gwodder:

You click and click on the dollar sign in the top right corner of the page, but it just takes you to the [[Infictive:About]] page. You are rebuffed by some kind of secret hand signal.

You click on the dollar sign again anyway. You wish this thing worked. How are you supposed to give Infictive any money?

You stop. You realize how stupid you're being. Obviously you have to click the button the right way. There's a code you have to know. You wish you'd realized this before you started clicking, because there's no way to start over. That's what makes this so devilishly clever. You'll have to use a different computer and try again.

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?]]

You click and click on the Dollar sign in the top right hand corner of the site.

2026-02-22T05:55:11Z

Gwodder:

You click and click on the dollar sign in the top right corner of the page, but it just takes you the [[Infictive:About]] page. You are rebuffed by some kind of secret hand signal.

You click on the dollar sign again anyway. You wish this thing worked. How are you supposed to give Infictive any money?

You stop. You realize how stupid you're being. Obviously you have to click the button the right way. There's a code you have to know. You wish you'd realized this before you started clicking, because there's no way to start over. That's what makes this so devilishly clever. You'll have to use a different computer and try again.

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?]]

You click and click on the Dollar sign in the top right hand corner of the site.

2026-02-22T05:54:44Z

Gwodder: Created page with "You click and click on the dollar sign in the top right corner of the page, but it just takes you the About page. You are rebuffed by some kind of secret hand signal. Yo..."

You click and click on the dollar sign in the top right corner of the page, but it just takes you the [[About]] page. You are rebuffed by some kind of secret hand signal.

You click on the dollar sign again anyway. You wish this thing worked. How are you supposed to give Infictive any money?

You stop. You realize how stupid you're being. Obviously you have to click the button the right way. There's a code you have to know. You wish you'd realized this before you started clicking, because there's no way to start over. That's what makes this so devilishly clever. You'll have to use a different computer and try again.

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?]]

You begin to envy the life of the cow

2026-02-22T05:45:38Z

Gwodder: Created page with "Just like everything else in life, being a pig is fun at first, but it gets old. The pigpen is cramped and the other pigs smell bad. The pig slop that the mayor feeds you ho..."

Just like everything else in life, being a pig is fun at first, but it gets old. The pigpen is cramped and the other pigs smell bad. The pig slop that the mayor feeds you honestly isn't very good. You spend hours gazing across the barn, over at the cows. The proud, dry cows, with their heads held high. Their beautiful white and black spotted hides are truly striking against the hay and straw. It's not fair. Why do they get to be cows, and you have to be a pig?

# [[You disguise yourself as a cow]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You like your pig disguise and you decide to keep it on

2026-02-22T05:40:29Z

Gwodder:

You like this pig life. You don't want to go back to humanity. The mayor comes by again to visit his barn. He looks right at you for several seconds, then just smiles and moves on. Your disguise is perfect! You almost can't believe it.

You just stay in the pigsty. After a while you forget it's a disguise. You're just a pig now. When you finally let go of yourself, your nervous system relaxes completely. You release your pig shaped contortion. No longer do you thrust and twist your face into the parody of a snout. You stop kneeling around on all fours. You still roll in the slop and oink and squeal, but you're doing like a man would instead of like a pig. The mayor comes by again and he seems even more pleased than before when he sees what you're doing.

# [[You fall in love with another pig and you have a little Sasquatch child.]]
# [[You never stopped to wonder why the mayor keeps so many pigs]]
# [[You begin to envy the life of the cow]]

[[Category:Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You like your pig disguise and you decide to keep it on

2026-02-22T05:40:10Z

Gwodder:

You like this pig life. You don't want to go back to humanity. The mayor comes by again to visit his barn. He looks right at you for several seconds, then just smiles and moves on. Your disguise is perfect! You almost can't believe it.

You just stay in the pigsty. After a while you forget it's a disguise. You're just a pig now. When you finally let go of yourself, your nervous system relaxes completely. You release your pig shaped contortion. No longer do you thrust and twist your face into the parody of a snout. You stop kneeling around on all fours. You still roll in the slop and oink and squeal, but you're doing like a man would instead of like a pig. The mayor comes by again and he seems even more pleased when he sees what you're doing.

# [[You fall in love with another pig and you have a little Sasquatch child.]]
# [[You never stopped to wonder why the mayor keeps so many pigs]]
# [[You begin to envy the life of the cow]]

[[Category:Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

Category:The Mayor's Vast Barn

2026-02-22T05:37:16Z

Gwodder:

[[Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn]]

[[but the stories simply don't do it justice.]]

[[File:Vastbarn.png|600x400px]]

'''You [[Go into hiding. The Mayor will never think to look for you in his vast barn]]'''

Category:The Mayor's Vast Barn

2026-02-22T05:37:03Z

Gwodder:

[[Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn]]

[[but the stories simply don't do it justice.]]

[[File:Vastbarn.png|600x400px]]

You [[Go into hiding. The Mayor will never think to look for you in his vast barn]]

You like your pig disguise and you decide to keep it on

2026-02-22T05:34:31Z

Gwodder: Created page with "You like this pig life. You don't want to go back to humanity. The mayor comes by again to visit his barn. He looks right at you for several seconds, then just smiles and mov..."

You like this pig life. You don't want to go back to humanity. The mayor comes by again to visit his barn. He looks right at you for several seconds, then just smiles and moves on. Your disguise is perfect! You almost can't believe it.

You just stay in the pigsty. After a while you forget it's a disguise. You're just a pig now. When you finally let go of yourself, your nervous system relaxes completely. You release your pig shaped contortion. No longer do you thrust and twist your face into the parody of a snout. You stop kneeling around on all fours. You spend most of your time lounging around. The mayor comes by again and he seems even more pleased when he looks at you.

You fall in love with another pig and you have a little Sasquatch child.

# [[Escape the barn with your newfound family]]
# [[Show the mayor the child]]

[[Category:Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

You disguise yourself as a pig and roll around in slop

2026-02-22T05:24:59Z

Gwodder: Created page with "You get naked and hunch your back over weird. You are already hairy and pink. You kind of force your face into the shape of snout and you wallow in the slop and try to act l..."

You get naked and hunch your back over weird. You are already hairy and pink. You kind of force your face into the shape of snout and you wallow in the slop and try to act like a pig. It's great! The mud is so thick and cooling. The other pigs are kind of being assholes to you but you don't even care! You roll around and oink and squeal. The mayor comes to visit his barn and he walks right past you without a second look. Your disguise worked!

# [[Harass the mayor from the slop pile]]
# [[You like your pig disguise and you decide to keep it on]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

Category:The Mayor's Vast Barn

2026-02-22T05:19:37Z

Gwodder:

[[Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn]]

[[but the stories simply don't do it justice.]]

[[File:Vastbarn.png|600x400px]]

Category:The Mayor's Vast Barn

2026-02-22T05:19:02Z

Gwodder:

Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn, but the stories simply don't do it justice.

[[File:Vastbarn.png|600x400px]]

Category:The Mayor's Vast Barn

2026-02-22T05:18:39Z

Gwodder:

Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn, but the stories simply don't do it justice.

[[File:Vastbarn.png|600x400px|thumb]]

Category:The Mayor's Vast Barn

2026-02-22T05:18:26Z

Gwodder:

Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn, but the stories simply don't do it justice.

[[File:Vastbarn.png|300x200px|thumb]]

File:Vastbarn.png

2026-02-22T05:16:43Z

Gwodder:

Category:The Mayor's Vast Barn

2026-02-22T05:14:59Z

Gwodder: Created page with "Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn, but the stories simply don't do it justice."

Ever since you were a child, you heard stories of the Mayor's barn, but the stories simply don't do it justice.

Go into hiding. The Mayor will never think to look for you in his vast barn

2026-02-22T05:14:01Z

Gwodder: Created page with "Good lord, man! The time you just wasted on that train of thought could have killed you it is time for action, not hesitation! You have to disappear where no one will follow..."

Good lord, man! The time you just wasted on that train of thought could have killed you it is time for action, not hesitation! You have to disappear where no one will follow and you have to do it now. You don't even have time to grab your go bag you need to go go go! You run out the side door in your slippers and bathrobe, leaving your house unlocked and almost a third of your booby traps aren't set.

You pad silently through town. It is late, it is dark, and all is quiet. Down the street a few blocks there is a mob setting fire to a Poldaki grocery store. They are far enough away that the noise doesn't bother you. You walk three and a half miles to the Mayor's estate, shrouded in darkness. Only an owl watches you as you slip through the hedge and enter the Mayor's barn.

The Mayor will never think to look for you in his vast barn. And even if he did, you are invisible here among the donkeys and the feed troughs.

# [[You disguise yourself as a pig and roll around in slop]]
# [[You burrow into a haystack]]
# [[You build a human nest in the rafters of the mayor's vast barn]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: The Mayor's Vast Barn]]

At last the mayor interrupts the broadcast

2026-02-16T02:42:34Z

Gwodder:

You begin to give up hope that the mayor will ever appear on television again. Descending into a dark well of drinking and watching porn on the internet. Sleeping at strange hours. You can't remember what you've eaten for days now. You are losing track of time. Shades drawn. Only the dim light of wretched internet pornography flickers against the walls of your fetid domicile

Three crying Japanese girls' wet faces flicker and are all smeared and suddenly replaced by the broad shining face of the Mayor in silence.

At last he speaks.

"If a man," the mayor says, "should see in this beautiful municipality a shining final beacon of hope and possibility in this world-nearly-dead, and come to desperately strive at shedding the skin of his life before and truly becoming One of Us,"

He takes a great breath filling his powerful bosom with life giving Air

"Then we shall welcome him within to Our bosums as unto a native born municipal Son."

Your own breathing shortens. You are starting to cry

"But there is a growing cohort of beings only seemingly Men who arrive in our town and who, upon their Very arrival, without stopping to learn the names of our grocers and proud gasoline - pumpers, "

"proclaim that we ourselves misunderstand the meaning of our own Municipal Creed, and deign to dictate to us its true meaning, which is that we owe them the fruit of our labor and of our very loins"

The mayor's face steels. In this terrible moment outshines the Sun Itself.

"And any true Son of our glorious municipality would sooner see that invader dead where he stands in the once pristine Street than removed in safety at the expense of the tax dollars with which we would otherwise feed and school our own families and neighbors of many generations"

O Heed! The voice of the mayor!

# [[You lose yourself in rapture, this time permanently]]
# [[You act upon the urgings of the Mayor]]
# [[You cannot wait for tomorrow's broadcast!]]
# [[You cannot discount the possibility that the mayor is trying to influence you personally to let your guard down.]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

At last the mayor interrupts the broadcast

2026-02-14T14:47:24Z

Gwodder:

You begin to give up hope that the mayor will ever appear on television again. Descending into a dark well of drinking and watching porn on the internet. Sleeping at strange hours. You can't remember what you've eaten for days now. You are losing track of time. Shades drawn. Only the dim light of wretched internet pornography flickers against the walls of your fetid domicile

Three crying Japanese girls' wet faces flicker and are all smeared and suddenly replaced by the broad shining face of the Mayor in silence.

At last he speaks.

"If a man," the mayor says, "should see in this beautiful municipality a shining final beacon of hope and possibility in this world-nearly-dead, and come to desperately strive at shedding the skin of his life before and truly becoming One of Us,"

He takes a great breath filling his powerful bosom with life giving Air

"Then we shall welcome him within to Our bosums as unto a native born municipal Son."

Your own breathing shortens. You are starting to cry

"But there is a growing cohort of beings seemingly Men who arrive in our town and who, upon their Very arrival, without stopping to learn the names of our grocers and proud gasoline - pumpers, "

"proclaim that we ourselves misunderstand the meaning of our own Municipal Creed, and deign to dictate to us its true meaning, which is that we owe them the fruit of our labor and of our very loins"

The mayor's face steels. In this terrible moment outshines the Sun Itself.

"And any true Son of our glorious municipality would sooner see that invader dead where he stands in the once pristine Street than removed in safety at the expense of the tax dollars with which we would otherwise feed and school our own families and neighbors of many generations"

O Heed! The voice of the mayor!

# [[You lose yourself in rapture, this time permanently]]
# [[You act upon the urgings of the Mayor]]
# [[You cannot wait for tomorrow's broadcast!]]
# [[You cannot discount the possibility that the mayor is trying to influence you personally to let your guard down.]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You manufacture your own ammunition while you wait for the mayor's next address

2026-02-14T14:40:16Z

Gwodder:

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You do some quick research on the Internet about how to make bullets. It's a very complicated process and you don't have the proper tools and resources to do it right now. You put all a Amazon order for the supplies you need but due to the outbreak is gonna take 3 weeks for it to arrive rather than 2 days. Meanwhile you are making do if what you have what you can get fortunately for you, this area back when it was a backwards farmland was the natural home of the now extinct rhuygff bird. You were wakened from me pleasant nap by the sound of a shotgun killing the last of these noble birds. The size of wild turkeys but fluffier their morning song was a beautiful thing back when it still existed. But the fields and groves all around your home are full of shotgun shells they can be the start of AMO making projects

# [[You look for a good source of lead]]
# [[Get a head start mixing up your own gunpowder]]

At last the mayor interrupts the broadcast

2026-02-14T14:38:02Z

Gwodder:

You begin to give up hope that the mayor will ever appear on television again. Descending into a dark well of drinking and watching porn on the internet. Sleeping at strange hours. You can't remember what you've eaten for days now. You are losing track of time. Shades drawn. Only the dim light of wretched internet pornography flickers against the walls of your fetid domicile

Three crying Japanese girls' wet faces flicker and are all smeared and suddenly replaced by the broad shining face of the Mayor in silence.

At last he speaks.

"If a man," the mayor says, "should see in this beautiful municipality a shining final beacon of hope and possibility in this world-nearly-dead, and come to desperately strive at shedding the skin of his life before and truly becoming One of Us,"

He takes a great breath filling his powerful bosom with life giving Air

"Then we shall welcome him within to Our bosums as unto a native born municipal Son."

Your own breathing shortens. You are starting to cry

"But there is a growing cohort of beings seemingly Men who arrive in our town and who, upon their Very arrival, without stopping to learn the names of our grocers and proud gasoline - pumpers, "

"proclaim that we ourselves misunderstand the meaning of our own Municipal Creed, and deign to dictate to us its true meaning, which is that we owe them the fruit of our labor and of our very loins"

The mayor's face steels. In this terrible moment outshines the Sun Itself.

"And any true Son of our glorious municipality would sooner see that invader dead where he stands in the once pristine Street than removed in safety at the expense of the tax dollars with which we would otherwise feed and school our own families and neighbors of many generations"

O Heed! The voice of the mayor!

# [[You lose yourself in rapture, this time permanently]]
# [[You act upon the urgings of the Mayor]]
# [[You cannot wait for tomorrow's broadcast!]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You begin to seek an audience with the mayor

2026-02-13T03:46:09Z

Gwodder: Created page with "The more you kill for the mayor, the steadier you seem to become to yourself. No more flinching at the slightest sound. You stride proudly through the world. You begin to f..."

The more you kill for the mayor, the steadier you seem to become to yourself. No more flinching at the slightest sound. You stride proudly through the world. You begin to feel that you might even deserve to meet the mayor in person. To gaze upon him directly and address him on common ground.

# [[You dismiss the thought that's crazy the mayor would never want to meet you]]
# [[Your conviction strengthens and grows]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

Category:What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?

2026-02-13T03:39:28Z

Gwodder: Created page with "What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?"

[[What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?]]

You look for Brenden Simpson

2026-02-13T03:39:02Z

Gwodder:

You are the only person left who is still writing new pages on Infictive dot com. Mystery X is dead and you have not spoken to Brenden Simpson in a decade. The last Chris Titan mask has finally crumbled to dust

You wouldn't know where to begin trying to find Brenden Simpson after all these years.

# [[You click and click on the Dollar sign in the top right hand corner of the site.]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: What Ever happened to Brendon Simpson?]]

You look for Brenden Simpson

2026-02-13T03:37:23Z

Gwodder: Created page with "You are the only person left who is still writing new pages on Infictive dot com. Mystery X is dead and you have not spoken to Brenden Simpson in a decade. The last Chris Ti..."

You become a deep cover operative at the beck and call of the mayor

2026-02-13T03:31:11Z

Gwodder:

You must become a weapon. A weapon with the only mind of its own being a focused intent on stalking and eliminating the enemies of the Municipality. The enemies of the Mayor are the enemies of humanity itself. You know this now. You must become stronger than any of them - than all of them.

You must become shadow. You stop existing in society. You train silently. In your home. The power and water and heat turned off for non-payment. In the darkness you grow stronger until you are ready.

The mayor speaks to you. Not over the television anymore. And not in the flesh. His message radiates to you. His orders are simply there. At issue they are already known to you. And you carry them out. You carry them out in silence, and you come home.

# [[You begin to seek an audience with the mayor]]
# [[You chafe against anonymity as your actions increasingly improve the world in noticeable ways]]
# [[You look for Brenden Simpson]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You become a deep cover operative at the beck and call of the mayor

2026-02-13T03:30:48Z

Gwodder:

You must become a weapon. A weapon with the only mind of its own being a focused intent on stalking and eliminating the enemies of the Municipality. The enemies of the Mayor are the enemies of humanity itself. You know this now. You must become stronger than any of them - than all of them.

You must become shadow. You stop existing in society. You train silently. In your home. The power and water and heat turned off for non-payment. In the darkness you grow stronger until you are ready.

The mayor speaks to you. Not over the television anymore. And not in the flesh. His message radiates to you. His orders are simply there. At issue they are already known to you. And you carry them out. You carry them out in silence, and you come home.

# [[You begin to seek an audience with the mayor]]
# [[You chafe against anonymity as your actions increasingly improve the world in noticeable ways]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You become a deep cover operative at the beck and call of the mayor

2026-02-13T03:30:32Z

Gwodder: Created page with "You must become a weapon. A weapon with the only mind of its own being a focused intent on stalking and eliminating the enemies of the Municipality. The enemies of the Mayor..."

You must become a weapon. A weapon with the only mind of its own being a focused intent on stalking and eliminating the enemies of the Municipality. The enemies of the Mayor are the enemies of humanity itself. You know this now. You must become stronger than any of them - than all of them.

You must become shadow. You stop existing in society. You train silently. In your home. The power and water and heat turned off for non-payment. In the darkness you grow stronger until you are ready.

The mayor speaks to you. Not over the television anymore. And not in the flesh. His message radiates to you. His orders are simply there. At issue they are already known to you. And you carry them out. You carry them out in silence, and you come home.

# [[You begin to seek an audience with the mayor]]
# [You chafe against anonymity as your actions increasingly improve the world in noticeable ways]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You act upon the urgings of the Mayor

2026-02-13T03:22:05Z

Gwodder: Created page with "WAR! Bloody War against the enemies of the Township! # You muster as many as you can from the homes all around you # You wage a guerilla war against the invader among..."

WAR!

Bloody War against the enemies of the Township!

# [[You muster as many as you can from the homes all around you]]
# [[You wage a guerilla war against the invader among us]]
# [[You become a deep cover operative at the beck and call of the mayor]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

At last the mayor interrupts the broadcast

2026-02-13T03:19:35Z

Gwodder: Created page with "You begin to give up hope that the mayor will ever appear on television again. Descending into a dark well of drinking and watching porn on the internet. Sleeping at strange..."

You begin to give up hope that the mayor will ever appear on television again. Descending into a dark well of drinking and watching porn on the internet. Sleeping at strange hours. You can't remember what you've eaten for days now. You are losing track of time. Shades drawn. Only the dim light of wretched internet pornography flickers against the walls of your fetid domicile

Three crying Japanese girls' wet faces flicker and are all smeared and suddenly replaced by the broad shining face of the Mayor in silence.

At last he speaks.

"If a man," the mayor says, "should see in this beautiful municipality a shining final beacon of hope and possibility in this world-nearly-dead, and come to desperately strive at shedding the skin of his life before and truly becoming One of Us,"

He takes a great breath filling his powerful bosom with life giving Air

"Then we shall welcome him within to Our bosums as unto a native born municipal Son."

Your own breathing shortens. You are starting to cry

"But there is a growing cohort of beings seemingly Men who arrive in our town and who, upon their Very arrival, without stopping to learn the names of our grocers and proud gasoline - pumpers, "

"proclaim that we ourselves misunderstand the meaning of our very own Municipal Creed, and deign to dictate to us its true meaning, which is that we owe them the fruit of our labor and of our very loins"

The mayor's face steels. In this terrible moment outshines the Sun Itself.

"And any true Son of our glorious municipality would sooner see that invader dead where he stands in the once pristine Street than removed in safety at the expense of the tax dollars with which we would otherwise feed and school our own families and neighbors of many generations"

O Heed! The voice of the mayor!

# [[You lose yourself in rapture, this time permanently]]
# [[You act upon the urgings of the Mayor]]
# [[You cannot wait for tomorrow's broadcast!]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You turn your attention back to the mayor on TV for guidance

2026-02-13T03:08:28Z

Gwodder:

It's true that you are acutely aware of the possibility that you could be ambushed at any time, but well there's nothing new about that. [[You Are Used To It]]. You relax and turn the TV back on, feeling secure in your fortress and content to wait at home until the Mayor gives further instructions. You have plenty of terrible foods such as [[Taco Pop]] and [[Chef_Ormole_DeChams]]'s frozen fried meatballs, sufficient [[Cult Spread]], and there is no need for you to [[Apply for government cheese]]. You feel responsible, and proud.

The mayor doesn't seem to be making live speeches on any of the channels, so you just watch TV for a while. You watch some government shows and some shows about how clocks work. You watch the news and a house show and drink a [[Taco Pop]] and you wonder if the mayor might not be making any other speeches tonight. You better leave the TV on the news channel just in case and sleep on the couch tonight. In the protective and warm informative glow of the television screen and its promise of guidance from the mayor.

# [[Your deep familiarity with terrible danger and sudden violence comes from war]]
# [[It comes from a life of crime]]
# [[You have made an abnormally large number of enemies in your life]]
# [[At last the mayor interrupts the broadcast]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]

You see other hoarders and you follow them home planning to burglarize their stashes while they are away

2026-02-04T02:51:20Z

Gwodder:

The better you get at hoarding, the more tricks you learn to get away with it, the more those same behaviors start to stand out to you when other people display them in public. You're not the only person driving from store to store, buying an entire shelf's worth of necessary goods, and driving home on back grounds to secret them away in your shed, or bury them beneath the basement floor, or to cram them up in the attic. Stealing an abandoned car in the supermarket parking lot so that it's harder to track you from store to store. Someone posts on the neighborhood watch website that you are a hoarder. You suspect it's one of the other hoarders, trying to draw attention away from them selves, and towards you. To keep the eye of the public off of themselves they have violated the hoarder's code!

You see one, one day. Nervously loading his trunk full of cans of conch meat and tiki torches. You decide to follow him back to his stash. He lives on the other side of town from you.

# [[You stake him out and case the joint for a few nights.]]
# [[You follow him to his house and confront him in the driveway]]
# [[You wait for him to go inside and steal all his cans and torches out the back of the car]]
# [[You kick his door in]]

[[Category: Hyperwiki Adventure]][[Category: If You Can't Trust the Mayor...]]